Always Eat Before Getting Blood Drawn, Unless Told Otherwise...

I decided to get a physical because it's been probably a couple years now. Being sort of a hypochondriac (every time I get a cold I think it's pneumonia), I figured it would be good to just go in and get checked out.

I called the office of Dr. Pedre, and they told me they'd need to do blood work, and that I cannot eat the night before getting my blood drawn.

I think you know where this is going.

So I show up at the office, kind of blissfully starved. A kid I knew in high school's brother once told me that if you don't eat for three days you'll see Jesus Christ. I guess I can vibe with that, but I just sort of felt disconnected and silly.

I have never watched as someone takes blood from my arm before. I don't mind seeing other people get blood drawn, I just don't like seeing my own.

As soon as the needle hit my arm I start to feel REALLY lightheaded, more so than every before. I tell the nurse this, and by the time I finishing telling her I'm out. I start to feel myself shaking but I can't do anything to control my body. All these crazy flashing images start shooting through my head and I remember feeling absolutely terrified. Luckily, the first thing I did when I got to the office was pee in a cup, otherwise I would have peed in my jeans.

When I woke up three people (2 nurses and the doctor--who I'd never met before) were standing around me. They all made sure I was OK, gave me an apple jolly rancher, and let me lie down for a while. It was the best jolly rancher I ever had...

But now, because I went all crazy pass-out/"seizure-y" with the needle in my arm I have this GIANT bruise inside my elbow now.

When I left the office I ate everything in sight, including: a Mediterranean Wrap from Au Bon Pain, (2) Cliff Bars, a bag of Doritos, a large tandoori chicken salad, and an Orange Cranberry Muffin.