High School Football Star

I realized recently that I can't stop recounting what my life was like before I moved to New York. Like the townie who was a high school football star who always talks about the game where he threw 6 touchdowns, or an aging rock star who carries around at all times a list of women he slept with on the road, I find that I'm constantly comparing my "new" life to my "old Seattle life." Undoubtedly it annoys everyone around me, and I thank them for listening politely while I remember what driving felt like, or what Evergreens trees smell like, or how I once wasn't an Assistant.

There was this guy I used to work with, his name was Eric. He was a stockbrocker when he was young, in New York City. Something happened along the way and at the age of 67 I was his boss. He would always tell the same stories, and they never failed to irritate me, especially when I was trying to get him to do something for work I would never want to do.

This isn't something I did before I moved here. I got to thinking tonight why I keep bringing up the past. And then it dawned on me that I keep remembering my old life because that's what I can hold on to. I don't know what's going to happen here, my roots aren't settled yet, and how can you really feel engaged if you don't seem "in it." So starting now, I guess, I'm going to try to not think about how things used to be. I'm going to pretend that I'm not starting over again, but that I'm just starting. Maybe this will make a difference, and maybe I'll stop sounding like Uncle Rico from Napolean Dynamite.